When I planned out this summer, it didn't sound quite so overwhelming. Granted, I didn't really plan half of what happened, and the other half I didn't really think about. It sounded like an epic adventure that I'd read about from some well-travelled author, or something that would go on my bucket list but never be achieved.
Let's just call it what it is: I'm a nomad, by nature. I'm someone who doesn't really settle in, who doesn't nest, and who has spent the better part of her adult life running away from roots rather than putting them down. It's something God is working on in my heart.
But this summer, He graciously allowed me to indulge my desires to run rampant around this beautiful globe and play like a kid in a sandbox! Not only did He allow it, but He actively orchestrated it without me even realizing it was happening! And what a joy it was to see His work being actively and wholeheartedly pursued around the globe, in ways I never thought I'd get to see. My God is up to something in the hearts of so many people, He is working mightily in so many places - and everywhere, He is the same! I have been reminded of how incredibly, faithfully consistent my God is. His hesed love, his covenant with his people - how it is being worked out everywhere in this world!
Only now, nearly 2 months after returning from my latest trip, am I finally able to step back and look at the last 5 months as a whole. I spent so much time getting ready to travel or processing each trip, that I wasn't able to step back and see the whole thing until recently. I traveled from the West to East coast of this country (~3200 miles and 12 states), to 2 countries in the Caribbean and one in Central Asia. Everywhere I went, I saw the beauty of God's character, the majesty of His work, and the love of His people manifested in new and bright and breathtaking ways. I'm so thankful for the brothers and sisters who prayed relentlessly for each trip, for the the family who funded much of it, for the friends who were able to accompany me, and the new friendships formed.
Now, it's all catching up with me. The exhaustion. The processing. The sitting still. The Lord has taken this season of indulgence and used it to bring me into a season of challenges. It's just one of those times when I have to fight for everything. I am mourning, learning, re-evaluating, seeing sins, and learning about service. It's a hard season. But a good one. It is a season of complete and utter dependence on the Lord of creation.
This is a season I could not survive, however, without my dear brothers and sisters in Christ. The ways God is working on my heart are profound and beautiful - I am learning to trust people, to open up to people, to love and serve those around me, and to be loved and served. I am more thankful than ever that the Lord has redeemed not only me as an individual, but his whole Bride. I could not persevere through this without their support and love.
And I am abundantly thankful that He knows my heart so well, that he could orchestrate such a wonderfully delightful summer, and simultaneously give me the best and most supportive church family to come home to.
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